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Ella

Micha won’t textaway at my mind I need to find out where he is, but Caroline’s rapher and wants to take pictures of the different views of our town I take her to the lake first because it’s the sunnier side of town, and pull over in a few different turnouts that give her various views When we reach the bridge, she gets really enthusiastic and wants pictures of it too

"It has so much history to it," she says "And it probably carries a lot of memories for people"

I wonder if Caroline is a rapher

A thin cloud of dust surrounds us as I tap the brakes and park the car just at the brink of the bridge and she hops out with her ca our sweet tie

"So is this the bridge?" Lila asks, watching lasses

I stare at the spot on the ground where Micha and I stood kissing in the rain "Yeah, this is the bridge" With a quiver inGripping the bar, I gaze out at the lake, glistening in the sunlight, so ht

Caroline clicks her cale while Lila roah ht I’d been cleaning outand had come across the bottle of pills she’d taken to keep her delusions under control I’d wondered if they’d worked for her and how they made her mind see life So I took one to see for myself and then headed off with Micha to a party

As soon as I’d cli was off with me "You look out of it," he said "Maybe we should just stay in tonight"

I shook , he drove us to the party, but he kept a close eye onrew restless with the desire to figure out what the hell irl, I cornered Grantford and asked hi he was going to get so buckets of water I thanked hio He was pissed and started ya about why the hell did he drive ed and sla out into the rain He spun away froravel andand stepped up onto the curb, observing the water through the veil of rain But it wasn’t close enough, so I stepped up onto the bea

It still didn’t ht she could fly and I don’t think it ever will

I jerk away fro and concentrate on Caroline, who’s still snapping pictures, with the long lens of her camera close to my face

"You’re a deep thinker," she reraph well"

I shake my head "No, I’m not Not really"

She snaps another picture and h a totally different eye I think it makes me see people differently - more clearly"

"Like a mirror?"

"Yeah, kind of"

She turns the lens toward the lake and starts snapping pictures of it I recline against the railing and scroll through es I only have one, Micha’s voiceo I decide maybe it’s time

I press dial and put it up to my ear

"Hey Ella, it’s Micha," he says nervously, unlike hi line, so pretend you didn’t hear that"

A ss at the corners of my lips That sounds more like him

"Anyway, I’m kind of irritated that you just took off and haven’t called" He pauses and I can hear Ethan in the background "Actually, I’ pissed off I don’t even knohat to say You just bail after everything we’ve been through Do you kno crazy I’ve been wondering where you were or if you were even alive?

My heart compresses in my chest I’ve never heard him so upset

"You just bailed out on everyone and people need you, even if you don’t think so Grady’s sick - he has cancer and" He inhales a shaky breath "I still love you I don’t knohat else to say and there’s probably not even a point of saying anymore you won’t call e ends It’s not what I was i I’d never once looked at it from his side - hoorried he ain, he doesn’t respond

One week passes and I still don’t hear from Micha He won’t call ht to voicemail His et really worried

Ever since I returned froes of what happened when Micha picked h ht, not with Micha, but with me

I arrive at the conclusion, while I’ at his vacant driveway, that it’s ti on with Micha There is only one person I could think of who ht knohere he is Ethan And I need backup

"What are we trying to get out of him?" Lila asks as I drive up to the shop Ethan works at

"Where Micha is" I tell her, putting the shifter into park "And I think Ethan ht know"

Her forehead scrunches as she eyes the open garage door Ethan is behind a car being worked on, tossing a screwdriver and catching it like a baseball "But why am I here?"

"Because you’re my backup"

"And what exactly is it you want me to do?"

"I’ the situation

Ethan is dressed in a nice pair of jeans and plaid button-down shirt, not his work clothes, whichthis as difficult as possible Especially if Micha told hihs at so his dad said Then his eyes find my dad’s Firebird and his expression drops I open the door and he thron the tool and runs through the shop I jog across the gravel and swing open the front door, leaving Lila behind

Sitting behind the counter is Mrs Gregory, Ethan’s mother who has the same dark hair and brown eyes as Ethan She looks up quickly frohten

"Ella, is that you?" She gets up fro "I didn’t know you were back, honey"

"For the summer, I am" My eyes skim the room and the shop "Is Ethan in there?"

She points over her shoulder "He just ran back into the storage rooet him?"

"Would you mind if I did?" I ask politely

"Sure, hun" She steps aside and lets e roo parts for cars It’s quiet, dark, and the sink has a drip

"Ethan," I say, shutting the door quietly behind me "I know you’re in here"

"I hear a shuffle froonal froh the shelf, and catch hi to cut him off at the end by the door

"Ethan will you please talk to ht, I exit the aisle "Look, I know he told you where he went, so will you please just tell me or at least tell me if he’s okay"

He suddenly reveals himself from an aisle a fen "He told me not to tell you where he was"

I pressin my heart "I need to know I’m worried about hie of a shelf "Well, now you kno he’s felt for the last eightof reality sinks in "Please, please, will you just tell "

He eyesfor my sincerity "He went to see his dad"

My jaw almost hits the floor "When did he find out where his dad was?"

Ethan sighs and leans against the shelf "He started calling the house a feeeks ago, asking to talk to Micha Micha wouldn’t talk to hio, he finally decided it was tio see him"

"Is he still with his dad?" I ask

He hesitates "No Let’s just say the visit didn’t go very well"

I force the lump in my throat down "Is he okay?"

"I’ with some of our old friends over at Farrows Park the last ti back?"

"Again, I’m not sure"

I sink to the cold concrete floor and let my head fall into my hands "Why didn’t he tell me?"

Ethan puffs out a loud breath and sits down besidewith his problems on top of your own He worries about you all the ti" I raise es me with his elbow "What? I’m the one who’s had to listen to hiht months At one point, I almost stabbed my ears out just so I didn’t have to hear it"

I give a gentle pat to his knee "Pretend all you want You’re not as bad of a guy as you want people to think"

He co to my words "Yeah, yeah, say what you want, but deep down, I’uy out there"

Laughing, we get up and go out to the lobby, where there’s a guy waiting at the front counter He walksout on the hood of oing to do?" he asks as I push open the door

"I’ to tellat"

"I don’t think it’d be a good idea for you to go there He needs to clear his head" He backs up toward the register with his hands stuffed into his pockets "I got customers to take care of"

I meet Lila at the car and she slides off the hood "Did he tell you anything?"

We cliue details of what happened

"So where are we going?" she asks, buckling her seatbelt

The sunlight sparkles through the windshield and intoho by and I still don’t hear anything from Micha It baffles me howto get sucked up in the loneliness and worry

Dean and Caroline went hoo Caroline told me they’d come back to visit before the suain at the wedding, which is in October

Lila is out for the day with Ethan, not on a date, soht it up My dad is locked in his rooht I received a call froI need a break from my house, I peek in on my dad who is fast asleep, and then drive over to Grady’s house Amy’s car is parked in front of the trailer and the front door is wide open, swaying in the wind a little