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"I don’t mind"
"That bastard Kristoff was ready to fire at her I barely--"
"Thank you, Lieutenant" He was out the door
Tatiana was sitting on the bottom stair, her head pressed to the wall
"Tatia?" He came to stand in front of her "What’s happened?"
"Dasha can’t get up There was no bread at the store" She couldn’t even look up
"Come" He extended his hand She took it but couldn’t pull herself up He had to place both his arently
She nodded
"Come to the mess" Alexander found Tatiana a piece of black bread with a teaspoon of butter, half a cooked potato with soar She ate gratefully and drank "What about Dasha?" she asked
"Eat I have food for Dasha"
He gave her another hunk of black bread, half a potato, and a handful of beans that she stuffed in her coat pocket "I wish I could come with you," Alexander said "But I can’t I can’t leave the barracks today"
"That’s fine," Tatiana said, and thought, I don’t think I can make it back I don’t think I can It was after lunch hour in theat the tables
Tatiana wanted to ask Alexander about his week, about Petrenko, who time, and about Dimitri She wanted to tell him about Kristoff She wanted to tell hio to the post office again, but she couldn’t walk there by herself anymore
Tatiana wanted to tell him about Dasha But the effort required to continue that conversation was too great even in Tatiana’s head To make the words come out of her hts, was uniy to chew the bread she needed to live She couldn’t think past the black bread in front of her I’ll tell him another time
They both reate She sturound and nearly fell "Oh,her Tatia htening up, she leaned on his arht Don’t worry"
"Wait here" He sat her on a bench near the gate and strode off A few minutes later he came back with a sled and said, "Come I’ll take you home Stepanov let me have two hours" He put his ar I’ll do everything You just sit"
Alexander signed hiate "I’m very sorry about before," the corporal said to Tatiana, throwing a fearful look in Alexander’s direction Alexander opened his , but Tatiana pulled him by the sleeve of his coat She didn’t shake her head, didn’t say a word, just pulled him, and he prodded her away a little, closed his mouth, clenched his fist, and punched Kristoff in the face The corporal fell to the ground "I’ll be back in two hours, Corporal," he said, "and then I’ll deal with you"
Alexander told Tatiana to sit She lay down instead She thought, I don’t want to lie down I’m not a corpse yet Not yet But she couldn’t help it She couldn’t sit up
Tatiana lay on her side, and Alexander pulled the sled through the snow, through the quiet, snowed-in streets of Leningrad in the ht, it’s too heavy for him It’s always him When we first met, he carriedme She wanted to reach out and touch the bottom of Alexander’s coat Instead she fell asleep
When she opened her eyes, Tatiana saw Alexander crouching beside her, his warm bare hand on her cold bare cheek "Tatia," he whispered, "co to die with Alexander’s hand on ht That is not a bad way to die I cannot et up Just can’t She closed her eyes and felt herself drifting
Through the haze in front of her she heard Alexander’s voice "Tatiana, I love you Do you hear me? I love you like I’ve never loved anyone in et up and go take care of your sister Go on And I’ll take care of you" His lips kissed her cheek
She opened her eyes He was very close to her, and his eyes looked true Did she just hear hi he loved her for so ed for those words, longed for theain?
Tatiana got up He couldn’t carry her up the slippery stairs on his back But he put his ar sheapartment, but at the door to their hallway Tatiana stopped "Go in," she said "I’ll wait here Go and see if she’s" Tatiana couldn’t finish
Alexander brought her inside and then went into the bedroom "Yes, Tania," she heard his voice "Dasha is fine Come in"
Tatiana caht you food"
Dasha, her eyes two large brown saucers, two large brown eaze traveling froot to go," said Alexander "Go early toh here for you until then Have you girls already eaten all your barley?" He kissed Dasha on the head "I’ll bring you more tomorrow"
She lifted her arm to hiht Just get your rations I’ll coet up off the floor?"
"I can get up," she said
"Right," he said, and put his hands under her aro"
She stood up She wanted to look at hi, so instead she looked at Dasha It was easier; her head was already bent down "Thank you, Sh -- Alexander"