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An Act of Kindness
I hurried down the hall and up the flight of stairs to the second floor Passing three closed doors, I found the one that would be hoers on the handle and closedbreath With a sharp exhale, I opened the door and was greeted with absolute silence
I scanned the roo into a classroo for my friends I was i at hter lips, some just looked curious, but every head was in my direction As my eyes flicked over the back of the silent roo One head was still down, the owner of it doodling on a notebook in front of thenition of bathrooirl in the back row She was oblivious to the sudden tension in the roo andto the front of class where a person ardly clearing their throat
"Lucas, ulish teacher and she was giving lances, obviously not sure how to deal with me I wondered for aright in front of her Her pale eyes glanced overon one, as she adjusted and readjusted a stack of papers in her hands
"I&039;llumlet the tardiness slidejust for today I&039;"
She let her thoughts die out and I was ling to put her words together Was I havingwhat? A hard ti? Well, sure, of course I was What else was today going to be for hth School Past" that were going to pop up as I walked throughout the school today were going to be pleasant forwar to suck
I didn&039;t say any of that to her though I adjustedto the only available seat, in the very back roouldn&039;t make Ms Reynolds look bad in front of her class, that wasn&039;t uy in the school "liked" her She had started working here right after college and as a result, she looked (and was) not ht brown hair cut in a stylishly short pixie style that Lil used to rave about and her clothes were always the newest, latest trends, which Sammy used to ooh and aah over As for Darren and mewell, let&039;s just say she filled out those "trends" nicely
Forcing thoughts of my friends to the back of my mind, I walked past a member of my football team Will McKinney He and I&039;d had a friendly co to be the quarterback for that year I&039;d beat him out both years, but he&039;d been jovial about the loss, jokingly saying that he&039;d just breakToday was apparently that day
His foot caht the edge of it I tripped over hih, he raised his foot once he&039;d jostled ht down to the floor, s round Great
Ms Reynolds scolded Will up and down and started swiftly coered as I stood onht now I shrugged it off and looking behind lance at a s the two seats to the open desk in the back row Will bumped fists with the other hed while students around the lance at the person beside htTwain fansSawyer She&039;d finally looked up when she&039;d heard the snickers in the roo ain She wouldn&039;t have to be curious for too ray eyes staring atto ask ht, but at that uys, like I was saying, there is going to be a grief counselor on staff full time this year, so if any of you need to talk about" I looked up at her as what she was saying registered with , someone will be there for you" She said that solely toused to God, I didn&039;t want to lose it here
I broke eye contact with her, staring back down at the fake wood grain la in and out like a regular person, not letting this panic attack takethe counselor&039;s duties and hoe&039;d each gone through sooing to overlook that I wished they would I wished everyone would overlook it, so I could get through a few seconds in peace But I wasn&039;t the only one hurtingand some people did actually want to talk about it I heard a few sniffles around the roo uplike she was on the verge of tears herself, Ms Reynolds went on to the next order of business I hoped it was so It wasn&039;t Today was just not edy, the school has decided to is, no alcohol, no weaponson or off campus Any offense will result in immediate suspension A second offense will lead to immediate expulsion" A buzz went around the roo It was understandable that the school would be tough on that stuff on school grounds, but the school was going to try and stop high schoolers fro off campus? Because of me? A few harsh words were muttered and more than a few harsh looks were sentquieted, if not stopped "Now, this isn&039;t to punish, this is to discourage We want you all to be safe" She extended her sliether I heard a few people mutter my name and swear "There will also be a Safe and Sound club starting, to further proain when she said that and I could tell then, that she believed it too She thought I&039;d been drunk By her look and tone, she didn&039;t see me for it, mistakes do happen after all, but she believed it, and she was hoping I&039;d join this little "purity" club
My jaw clenched They&039;re all so wrong Breatheinout Calirl, Sawyer She et why I seehed softly; she would soon enough
Ms Reynolds let out a shaky breath and shook her head, a large sirls in the roo about the no substances stance the school was taking No one looked at ain, but I felt the heat of every non-existent stare Ms Reynolds next words did absolutely nothing to dispel that feeling
"Okay, for your first real assigne essay on what you did this suaped at her What I did this summer? I mourned the loss of three of my best friends I yelled I cursed God I cried, no, I sobbed, for countless hours I went to funerals, where kids and adults alike shunned uilt I still was And she wanted me towrite about that?
Her eyes flicked overrooain as she looked at all the students and then her head whipped back around to stare at me "OhLucas" Her face paled and her mouth dropped open as what she&039;d just asked me to do sank in Her eyes watered and she shook her head "You don&039;t have toyou can write whatever you want"
Every head in the rooht anger, soain and I could feel ht here in front of everyone I grabbedand bolted out of my chair I couldn&039;t do it I couldn&039;t cal today was a bad idea
As our seats had a bar holding up the writing table, you had to get in and out of the as how he had the ain And since today was really notup or hyperventilating, or soain
I fell hard, both hands and knees hitting the ground this tihed and my head started to swim I wanted it to be over with All I did was make a mistake All I did was drive poorly and lose control of the car Why did no one believe that?
Soft hands helped ht, Lucas Everything will be alright"
My heart stopped It was Lillian&039;s voice that I&039;d heard in my ear Her sweet, ht to near i it again, hearing it clearly My head shot up as htened underneathto see Lillian, see her delicate ar to steady me But it wasn&039;t Lil&039;s pale hair that filled my vision No, I was met with black hair
My brows scrunched as I looked back into Sawyer&039;s gray eyes She had sounded so rabbed a lock of her hair, ignoring the sound of the class still laughing and Ms Reynolds trying, without much luck, to subdue them Her hair was soft but undeniably black I didn&039;t understand My eyes watered and obscured vision added toand sto if I&039;d gone completely mad
"Co like Lillian at all any off the floor and then shuffled me forward and for a ot to the front, she hastily told Ms Reynolds that she was taking me to see the counselor I wanted to roll o sit back down and yell at everyone that I was fine I couldn&039;t though I couldn&039;t speak andto tear up I&039;d just clearly heard irlfriend&039;s voice I wasn&039;t fine
Ms Reynolds nodded and swooshed her ar relieved that I was about to be walking through them A crumpled up piece of paper hit the back of nored it all and focused on putting one foot in front of the other, while keeping h to think about
The door shut behindet sick in front of her She rubbed a hand onbreaths
"Are youalright?" she asked hesitantly
I shook ht? No, I hadn&039;t been that in awhile
"Do you want me to take you to that counselor person?" She adjusted her book bag on her shoulder up over her head so the strap rested across her chest
Again I shook rief counselor What did they know about being responsible for ending the lives of three people that you loved? What advice could they possibly give et better Time heals all wounds It was all crap and I didn&039;t want to hear it
"NoI just wantquiet" I finally got out between big breaths
She nodded and started pulling me away Confused, I looked around "What are youwhere are we going?"
She half grinned ataround her shoulders "Somewhere quiet"
She pulled ht she was going to pull us back into "our" bathroom She may have actually been about to do that, but e reached the last step on the stairs we noticed Coach Taylor going in there We both flattened against the wall so he wouldn&039;t see us
Coach had been my mentor in football since I had played Junior Varsity freshman year While he was an exceptionally hard and sterneant sort of way Darren and me both He&039;d been the one to see real potential in me and had worked tirelessly to stoke it I wasn&039;t sure what he believed about the crashbut I was sure I didn&039;t want to find out just yet
Sawyer didn&039;t seem to want a run-in with a teacher either, so once the bathroom door closed, she pulled my hand in the opposite direction She pulled us towards the janitor&039;s closet and I felt my body tense up Kids h school across Ae stoh No, I wasn&039;t afraid of being in a dark, enclosed space with a pretty girl I was afraid of the ghosts that awaited me in that room
Lil and I had been nearly naked in that room before I knownot romantic, but we&039;d been in love and desperate to connect and justfeel each other That rooht moans andinto that room, flashes of the encounter filledto the floor, her bra following,chair, her straddling rant skinfruity, like peaches, her hands snaking between us to unbutton my jeans
I pulled away from Sawyer just as her hand reached the knob She looked back at me surprised, and maybe a little hurt too, but I couldn&039;t worry tooher because I was about to lose whatever trace a it all over her, would most definitely offend her
I bolted out the front door and down the few steps leading up to the building I just e of the stairs whentoa few decorative bushes under the sI threw up Great
It was just once, and very quick, but enough tofrom behind me I silently thanked fate that I was a few feet from theand hadn&039;t just done that in front of a roo hand, I wiped off , deep breaths in the stillness of this cool autu, I turned my head to look at Sawyer I had no idea what she&039;d think of that, what she thought of anything about ether any of the conversations she&039;d probably heard thisover at her dark head, tilted slightly to the side, brows slightly bunched together, all I could read fro, she extended a hand toupon her thuht of this overcast day, and finally reached out to grasp it with my own