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I wasn’t holding the leash tightly enough

"Don’t," I tell hiet someone I’ll--"

I stand I don’t have a lot of time I need--

Chris Chris can fix this; he’s rich

I run to his house and pound on the door and ring the bell at the same time and it seems like hours before the door actually opens and there he is

Chris

"What the fuck--" He stops, his eyes traveling from my face to my hands to my shirt The parts of ot hit by a car I don’t knohat to do"

He stares at ives oing on?" Jake asks

I don’t have ti time I run back down the driveway and they both follow aftermy name

But they quiet when Bailey comes into view

"Oh God," Chris mutters

My pulse is in et to Bailey, he’s still

"I’m so sorry, Parker," Jake says

For a second, I think oes away

"This engine backfired or so; it really scared him" I stare at Bailey’s body It doesn’t even look real "I wasn’t holding the leash tightly enough"

"Did you see who did it?" Jake asks

"No--I thought there’d be ti for him," I say stupidly I wish his eyes would close Bailey’s "Sorry for dragging you out"

"It’s okay," Chris says

"No, it’s not I should really go"

I stand and start heading down the street without looking back at either of theet far away from Bailey’s body Take a shower Get his blood off of oing?"

I stop and turn I hear the question, but

"Your house is that way" Chris points in the opposite direction

"I’ll get there eventually"

"Why don’t you co"

"No thanks"

"I know you," he says "You won’t go hoht"

No

"You have that car show"

"Forget it," Jake says

Chris holds out his hand

"Coh"

I don’t knohy I say it again They look at me funny And then Chris takes me by the elbow and the three of us walk up to his house

I can’t feel ht up with et from the house, the louder thedrumbeat winds its way into the woods from Chris’s open bedroo sounds fro and shrieking and having a good time

Because Chris’s parties are the best except when they’re not

Twenty-five steps into the woods, I think about lying down or turning back I can’t feel , and ot to fix this because I’m supposed to be better than this and what if everyone finds out I’ and I stop

"Go to the guest roohtshirt You knohere everything is," Chris says, closing the door behind us "Come down and we’ll have tea"

"Tea," I repeat faintly "Do you even kno tofor the kitchen

I go upstairs I sit on the bed in the guest roo anymore I just want to sit here with Bailey’s blood on me while he’s splayed out on the middle of the road

He can’t stay there forever

After a while, I tiptoe down the hall to Chris’s parents’ bedrooht I stare at myself in the mirrored cabinet I look really bad I open the cabinet and stare at the prescription bottles inside