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He opens his eyes We’re back where we started

"Sure"

We dance He wraps his arms around me and our foreheads touch and I decide this is the nice moment; this is what I’m allowed to have I like the way he feels next to irlfriend And then I pretend to be her and tomorrow doesn’t worryis fine

And then the dance ends

When I get ho off my wrist in Chris’s car, in the lab, on the dance floor, on the ride back

I cut off my hair

SEVENTEEN

Evan steps into the entrance corridor like a ghost

People pass hilance, none of them aware of this new old addition to the halls of St Peter’s High I watch--from a safe distance, of course--as he takes the school in like he’s never seen it in his life His hair is short, clean-cut like before, like Chris said it would be, but he’s done nothing for his weight

Leave

I think it as hard as I can, but Evan’s skull is so thick it’ll probably never get through Still Leave You’re not wanted here

I do not want you here

My chest gets tight and I try to focus on all those techniques on the paper Jake gave me, but it doesn’t work because I don’t remember them, and besides, they’d never work When ive Evan one last look and head in the opposite direction So I can’t be around hi school I could avoid him easily for the next fewraduate

"I want to graduate"

I don’t mean to say it out loud

"What?" Jake looks up froraduate It’s ratulations? It’s a very positive s you can’t do with soh relationship you already have:

1 Almost have sex with them in the school’s science lab

2 Give yourself a really bad haircut?

Actually, I’ to do with it He hasn’t said a word about it Chris freaked, Becky laughed--she’s finally better looking than I am--but Jake, Jake was quiet He’s been quiet I can’t even pretend to knohat he’s thinking about now and I hate that It messes me up

"Fadley! Gardner! In the na to start painting that thing?"

I juive him my sweetest smile, but he only raises one very unimpressed eyebrow at me I think my haircut has actually compromised the manipulative properties of my face

"You of all people should know real art can’t be rushed, Mr Norton," I say

"If that is real art, Fadley," Norton says, nodding at our paper, "then please direct me to that ravine so I can throw myself into it"

Jake stares determinedly at our landscape It’s not that bad "Art is subjective," I reest you get a move on Your landscapes are due at the end of this week"

The room explodes This is news to everyone Jake’s mouth drops open and several students etraduate I want to graduate Or else I’ll be stuck here forever

"Oh enuine delight Old bastard "Did I forget to tell all of you?"

"Okay, that’s it," Jake says "We need a plan and we need it now"

"I can’t think," I say I really can’t What if this is it? What if this is the stupid thing that keeps ers start tingling I press my hands flat on the desk Don’t think about it

"Co, anything"

"Jake, shut up I can’t--"

"Why am I not surprised?" he snaps

He wanders to the back for the paint, returning with five or six different colors, but by the time the period ends, neither of us has atteetting about the chapel, and when I get there the cheerleaders are preparing to practice and Evan is preparing to play basketball and everyone sees me come in, so I can’t leave

Chris walks over

"How did you get here?"

"I walked," I ht I have to fix it

"Coet you back inside You can crash in uy she’s with have gone Disappeared They were by the pool and now they’re not and I haven’t fixed it I turn to Chris "Where did they--where did they go?"

"Where did who go?"