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Leah felt wonderful Her workday had been full and rewarding She hurried into the parking lot and started her car, driving past the nativity scene on the hospital side yard A sense of expectancy filled her The way she felt, she didn’t need Dr Benoit to confirm what she already knew There wasn’t a doubt in her mind what he would tell her

The housekeeper had instructions to place a bottle of fine chaerator This evening she and Andreould celebrate She’d call her parents and if possible wait until the following evening to let Andrew’s ether for Christmas Eve

This would be the best Christmas ever, Leah was convinced of that

Dr Benoit was a kind, older physician with a quick wit and a gentle heart He’d been a co and confident when Leah felt having a child was hopeless It was only fitting that he be the one to tell her she was pregnant

"Leah," he said, co into the cubicle His sain"

"You were right," she said, holding onto his hand with both of hers "It’s happened Andrew and I are pregnant"

He said nothing, but then Leah gave him no opportunity

"Kathy is thrilled for me" Kathy was the nurse who’d collected the urine sa her to the chair "Leah, you don’t kno deeply this painsto have a baby How could such wonderful news pain you?"

The doctor’s eyes softened He took her hand in his "Leah, the test is negative"

"There ive anything to tell you otherwise"

"But I’ued "It isn’t possible for nant"

"The mind is very powerful I don’t believe science has a clue of its potential When a woman wants a child as fervently as you do, she’s sonant That’s what I believe happened in your case"

It wasn’t true Leah refused to believe it, and yet she had no choice Reaching for her purse, she walked toward the door

"Are you all right?"

"Sure," she said, but she wasn’t and she doubted that she ever would be again

Chapter 18

"You’re back early," Helen Chandler co the office party She took off her coat and hung it in the hall closet

"Jody, whatever is the matter?" her " Helen followed her into the kitchen where Jody poured herself a cup of coffee She wasn’t the least bit thirsty, but she needed so to hold onto while she steadied her nerves

"Where’s Timmy?" she asked, surprised not to find her son in front of the television screen, battling it out with alien warlords

"In his rooift for you He wouldn’t even shohat it is Now tell ood long while You’re as pale as a ghost"

"I broke off the engage Timmy to hear Not yet She’d tell her son as soon as she’d composed herself and could do so without eled with Glen’s and yet she ached for all theinto the chair

"I don’t love Glen"

"Love," her mother cried "How could you not love someone like Glen? He’s perfect for you and Timmy Why, that man walks on water You couldn’t ask for a better husband"

"I’ you say is true, but it washim I knohat it’s like to be deeply in love, but when it caht down to it, I realized I couldn’t accept second best"

Her rown to feel that way about hio of the past"

"There was one otherthe coffee htly "He’s in love with someone else and I learned that she’s still in love with hiainst the tabletop and hung her head "And so you did the noble thing and stepped aside Oh, Jody, what ahed and impulsively squeezed her mother’s arm "This entire experience has been a valuable lesson toI just didn’t expect it to hurt so much"

"Life’s lessons aren’t cheap"

Jody nodded "Ever since Jeff disappeared, I’ve clung to the ether The circu his death and all that followed caused me to build a cocoon around Tiain Jeff was a good husband and I loved hiht it was possible to love another human, but I’ve built up those years in my mind into a picture of paradise"

Herwhile for you to realize this It sounds like you’ve done so these last feeeks"

"I have," Jody ad "More than anything I realize I’ve clung to a half-filled glass, afraid to let go of that small bit of happiness I’d found and reach for the quart jar that was sitting right in front of me"

Helen’s frown deepened "I’lasses and quart jars I thought ere talking about you and Jeff"

"I’et back to my life now," Jody said pensively, "ready to reach out in faith and trust God for Ti to squeeze every bit of joy I can out of what’s left of my life For the first time since Jeff’s death I feel like I have one

"I don’t want to spend the rest of it alone, either There’s a ood father to Tiood husband for me A man who’ll be a friend, a partner, and a lover"