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He found Bernard and Anna sitting at Madge’s bedside Madge was as pale as the sheets Her eyes were closed, and Paul wondered if she’d slipped into a coma It would be merciful if she had

"Pastor" Bernard stood when he noticed Paul standing in the doorway "Mrs Johnson said she wasn’t sure if she’d be able to reach you or not"

"I cae’s eyes fluttered open "Pastor," she said in a voice so weak, Paul had to strain to hear "Good Good," she repeated weakly "I’ve been waiting for you"

"You want to talk to ain her voice was low, and she closed her eyes as though the effort drained her of what little strength she possessed "Yes"

"She’s been repeatedly asking for you," Anna explained softly

"Alone"

The request cae

"Mom wants us to leave her with Pastor Morris," Anna said to her father The two left the rooe opened her eyes They were dull with pain and drugs "It won’t be long now," she whispered

"No," Paul agreed "Are you afraid, Madge?" Perhaps that was the reason she wanted to talk to hiht

She smiled, and Paul swore it was one of theabout e adopted Anna," she said "How eager ere for our little girl Bernard and the boys had a roo to love her" She paused, and Paul suspected she needed to renew her strength before she continued "God is waiting to welcome me with the same love we had for Anna"

"Yes" Paul had never doubted that Barbara was in heaven or the elcoe whispered

"Healed?" The word tightened around his vocal cords He’d pleaded with God, begged, iained He would have sold his very soul to have seen Barbara healed

Faith His faith hadn’t been a tiny mustard seed When they’d first learned Barbara had cancer, and the odds given her, Paul had been confident, even cocky His faith was the size of an avocado seed

Through it all, his wife had remained committed to God’s will It came to the point that Paul couldn’t bear to hear the words

God had willed his wife to this terrible disease

God had willed her to suffer

God had willed her death

Dying himself would have been easier to bear

Now he stood at the bedside of yet another woman of faith A woman who had loved and served God faithfully And she too was about to cross the bridge that led fro

"There will be no cancer in heaven," Madge whispered

"Would you like me to read to you from Psalms?" Paul asked He didn’t knohat to say to her

"Barbara is healed"

Paul felt as if the softly whispered words reached up and slapped him hard across the face Jolted, he stepped back involuntarily

His as free of cancer Free of pain Free of earth’s restrictions He was the one as bound, tied up in doubts, choking on skepticisood people of God had force-fed hiether for good for those who loved God, Paul swore he was going to vo zealot dared to approach him with trite words, he didn’t know if he’d act responsibly

Faith and despair

Despair and faith

So alike he couldn’t tell theed in his uish one froe whispered "I waited so you’d know"

He frowned Know?

Unwilling to question Madge, he returned to the waiting area and called the Bartelli children and Bernard The four gathered quietly around Madge’s bedside

Paul opened the book of Psalms, the very one he’d read at Barbara’s deathbed As he whispered the words, he realized that for the first time since Barbara’s death, he found solace in the verses

Faith and despair For the first ti to understand the difference

There is no cancer in heaven, Madge had told hiical reason that Joy could na the red dress Three hundred and fifty dollars was a lot ofin her closet

Even if she dragged it out and ad time to justify that muchit That hat distressed her the most It would have been much better if he’d co between him and Blythe She could have put on the red dress just so he’d knohat he was leaving behind That was ridiculous, of course One didn’t wear a party dress for a big brush-off

As it happened, Ted had phoned The coward It had all been very polite He’d stiffly announced that he’d asked Blythe toshock Joy knew so was up when he’d canceled dinner with her fah loud and clear