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EVANNA HAD prepared a feast for us, but it was all vegetables and fruit - she was a vegetarian and wouldn’t allow anyone to eat meat in her cave Vancha teased her about it - "Still on the cow-food, Lady?" - but ate his share along with Harkat and h he only chose food which hadn’t been cooked

"How can you eat that?" I asked, revolted, as he tucked into a raw turnip

"All in the conditioning," he winked, biting deeply into it "Yu He was in a so off into space

The cave was far more luxurious than the caverns of Vampire Mountain Evanna had made a real hos on the walls and huge candle-lit la There were couches to lie on, fans to cool us, exotic fruit and wine After so , it seeested the meal, Vancha cleared his throat and broached our reason for being here "Evanna, we’ve come to discuss-"

She silenced him with a quick wave of a hand "We’ll have none of that tonight," she insisted "Official business can wait until tomorrow This is a time for friendship and rest"

"Very well, Lady This is your do back, Vancha burped loudly, then looked for somewhere to spit Evanna tossed a small silver pot at him "Ah!" he beamed "A spittoon" He leant over and spat forcefully into it There was a slight ’ping’ and Vancha grunted happily

"I was cleaning up for days the last time he visited," Evanna remarked to Harkat and me, "Pools of spit everywhere Hopefully the spittoon will keep hi for his into"

"Are you co about me?" Vancha asked

"Of course not, Sire," she replied sarcastically "What wo the floor with mucus?"

"I don’t think of you as a wohed

"Oh?" There was ice in her tone "What do you think of me as?"

"A witch," he said innocently, then leapt from the couch and raced out of the cave before she cast a spell on hiained her sense of humour, Vancha snuck back in to his couch, fluffed up a cushion, stretched out and chewed at a wart on his left palht you only slept on the floor," I rereed, "but it’d be impolite to refuse another’s hospitality, especially when your host is the Lady of the Wilds"

I sat up curiously "Why do you call her a Lady? Is she a princess?"

Vancha’s laughter echoed through the cave "Do you hear that, Lady? The boy thinks you’re a princess!"

"What’s so strange about that?" she asked, stroking her moustache "Don’t all princesses look like this?"

"Beneath Paradise, perhaps," Vancha chuckled Vao beyond the stars to Paradise when they die There isn’t such a thing as hell in vay - most believe the souls of bad vampires stay trapped on Earth - but occasionally one would refer to a ’beneath Paradise’

"No," Vancha said seriously "Evanna’s far al than any mere princess"

"Why, Vancha," she cooed, "that was al"

"I can flatter when I want," he said, then broke wind loudly "And flutter too!"

"Disgusting," Evanna sneered, but she had a hard ti about you on the way here," Vancha said to Evanna "We told hi of your past Would you care to fill him in?"

Evanna shook her head "You tell it, Vancha I’ But keep it short," she added, as he opened his in

"I will," he proasped "Areen hair, thought a while, then began in a soft voice which I hadn’t heard him use before "Heed, children," he said, then cocked an eyebrow and said in his own voice, "That’s the way to begin a story Humans start with ’Once upon a time’, but what do humans know about-"