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I woke up early nextIt was still pitch-black and silent outside After a few sleepy and blissfully ignorant moments had passed I quickly remembered all that had happened yesterday I was immediately consuain The night just ending had been long, dark and lonely I could still smell Siobhan&039;s perfu Maybe I would try and phone her later Perhaps I&039;d even pluck up the courage to go round and see her But then again perhaps I wouldn&039;t bother It hurt not being with her but I kneould hurt ain

For a while I lay in ap in the curtains The sky was dark - a deep, ruddy purple - but the darkness was very gradually being eaten away by the first distant glow of the orange light of dawn The tops of the trees I could see were perfectly still The onlyacross the ed myself out of bed a little after half-past five There didn&039;t see when there was virtually no chance of being able to get back to sleep again Dark, depressing thoughts were already beginning to run around my mind at a thousandroom in search of distractions I collapsed on the sofa and reached for the remote control I hadn&039;t been up at this hour of the day for a long, long tiht breakfast television programme on the TV The pictures on the screen provided a stark contrast to the cold, grey shadows in the gloom all around me

I didn&039;t want to be without Siobhan

I ended up at the far forward to so there, however, I found that I wanted to be alone I had a quiet ith Joe Porter and he seemed to understand He found me a job in one of the fields furthest fro that would last for a while and keep my mind and body fully occupied

And the therapy see out my frustration on a stretch of weather-beaten fence which Joe wanted replaced, I began to feel slightly better Even though nothing ht, I had at least raduallyand that it was Siobhan who had the proble I didn&039;t have to take the kind of crap that she&039;d hurled in my direction I loved her and I was there for her and, as far as I was concerned, that would always be the case So what had happened in her life to change things? Why had her opinion of ed so drastically?

The dilapidated fence that I was replacing separated a recently ploughed field frorazed As I worked the sheep becaot closer I found that the harder I concentrated on the job, the easier it was for me to switch off from my problems, but I was distracted when the nearby sheep suddenly scattered

There was a tractor approaching

I thought at first that there was an ee, heavy wheels churned up the pasture and sent the sheep running in all directions, aps where the fence was still down I stared at the driver and saw that it was Joe Porter hi He would never norard for his land or his livestock

He stopped the tractor alongside ?&039; he yelled over the deafening din of the engine

&039;Fixing the fence,&039; waswhat you askedthe right fence Joe looked ready to explode

&039;I can see that,&039; he snapped as he jumped down from his seat &039;I ain&039;t stupid I knohat I asked you to do&039;