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PRESENT

SEATTLE

There will be hundreds of days in my life that I won’t remember

But this is one day that I will never forget

Today I marry my wife Brooke “Little Firecracker” Dumas

I pro is what she’ll get

“I swear if you frown any harder at the door, it’s going to collapse under your stare,” my PA, Pete, calls from the couch

I swing around to where he and Riley have been watchingroom of Brooke’s old Seattle apartment Apparently those two are a Turning back to the bedroo

For the life ofIt’s been exactly fifty-eight et ready, when Brooke—ets dressed in five

“Dude, it’s her wedding day Chicks take a lot of tiet prepped” Riley thrusts his aresture that implies That’s life!

“Like you’re an expert now,” Pete jabs

“It’s the dress!” Melanie, Brooke’s best friend, says, exploding out of the master bedroom with a trail of white stuff that looks like a veil “It has all these buttonsand what are you three doing here anyway? Reuys should leave and we’ll meet you at the altar”

“That’s fking ridiculous,” I say, laughing But when Melanie keeps staring at the three of us, and especially s they want to scat, I scowl and head to the bedroom door

I curl h the closure slit “Brooke?”

“Remy, please don’t come in here!”

“Come to the door, then”

When I hear shuffling, I press closer to the edge and droprooht now, baby?”

All this entering and exiting the room by Melanie, with me separated by a locked door from my soon-to-be wife? I don’t like it And separated despite the fact that she’s supposed to be getting dressed for me

“I guess because I want you to see me walk up to you,” she whispers

God, that voice, right there Makes me want to throw the door down and kiss the hell out of her, then do stuff to her under that dress she’s trying to put on—the things that husbands do to their fking wives “I will see you walk up to me, baby, I just want to see you now too Open the door and I’ll do your buttons”

“You can undo them later and then do me” The cheeky statement is followed by a soft “Gaaah,” like so on the other side of this door

“Excuse me, Riptide,” Melanie says as she returns, and waves me away from the door “You boys should head out to church We’ll see you there in thirty minutes”

I scohen she slides inside the bedrooer Josephine steps out with soainst her chest My son looks at me from the crook of her arm and falls still; his lips are curled in such a way that he almost wears the same amused expression Pete and Riley do

He takes the hand he’s got stuck inside his mouth and slaps it flat and wet to s himself to me

Catching hirohich elicits another “Gaaaaaah!”

When I lift hted And so arumble at him, “You think I’m funny?”

“Gaaah!”

His eyes are all mischief His head is smaller than my palm as I cup it and buzz the fuzz on the top of his head My four-aveI’ve ever done in my life

I never thought I’d have so like him Now my life revolves around this di T-shirts, and od, where do I start with her?

Pete slaps ht, dude, you heard theet all that baby stuff on your suit!”

Clarins at me He has one dimple, not two Brooke says it’s because he’s only half mine I contest he’s all mine, and so is she