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Chapter 1

Micha

I’ not to think of all the , but it’s fking hard After everything we’ve been through, she didn’t even call or leaveback to the day after we kissed on the bridge and afterward how she told one over to her house the nextshe hadn’t changed her ht, after she’d sobered up

When I climbed up that tree and ducked into her rooone and that orse than just dealing with an Ella in denial over her feelings for me I knew she loved me even if she wouldn’t admit it, and I could handle that if itfroon that that place again

The cab driver isat a snail’s pace down the road that leads to the secluded neighborhood Ella and I have been living in and it’s driving me crazy He actually looked at Lila, Ethan, and me like ere the ones ere insane e’d hopped into the cab and I told hi about the speed limit

“Can’t you drive any faster at all?” I ask, thru”

He shootsthe speed limit”

“You say that like it’s okay,” I say, leaning forward toward the plasticdividing the front of the cab from the back

“Micha, relax” Lila touchesto calm me down Her blond hair and red dress are damp from her ju fun while aited for Ella to show up We all should be having fun But now I’ stood up

Stood up Shit

I sla I rarely do, but all I keeping thinking about is that she ran Again “I swear to God, you need to press down on that gas pedal or else—”

“Micha,” Lila hisses, her blue eyes firrabs my arm and jerks it away from the plastic hile the cab driver narrows his eyes “That’s not helping”

I rake h my hair and then undo the top button ofto call Ella for the hundredth tiht to her voice, but I knohat he’s thinking—that I should have expected this Except that’s the thing he doesn’t get Yes, Ella does this kind of stuff a lot but it’s because she’s either scared or confused or hating herself It’s what she’s done since ere kids I know this, just like I know that no ether

Finally, the cabbie pulls up in front of the sle-story house I’ve shared with Ella since earlier this year I don’t even bother waiting for the car to come to a complete stop before I shove open the door I toss a few bills through the slot in theand stumble over my boots as I step out onto the curb Ethan shouts atacross the lawn, sto the path to the front door

I remember e first cao and she said she could hook us up with a cute house we could rent for dirt cheap, due to the fact that the oas an old woht it back when houses were affordable Ella and I had taken our ti at the small bedrooms, the narrow but decent kitchen, and the wide backyard I could tell Ella was pretending that she was uninterested, but I could see it in her eyes that she loved the house

“So what do you think?” I’d asked, nudging her withthe front of the house

She’d nonchalantly shrugged, but bit her lip, whichto suppress her enthusiasm “It looks like a house”

I moved up behind her and wrappeda smile as I dipped myin?”

She dithered and then amusement laced her voice “Well, me yes, but you I’m not so sure Maybe we’ll have to find another place for you Or better yet, you could always live in the garage”

I pinched her ass and itall the many places in it that I could fk you,” I whispered hotly in her ear

She shuddered and I knew right then that it would be our first hoood for the last sixthan albu in concerts with a lot ofanywhere we can just to get the chance to play while Ella works at an art gallery and goes to school, wearing er She seemed happy and even content e decided it was ti I’ll admit I would have rather had it back home where my mom could co here, just she and I, and tell everyone later because it seedeal to me, not to have anyone there but Ella, me, Ethan, Lila, and the ave him my blood and in with But I know ot married without her… or she would have flipped anyway Now I’

Shaking the daht from my head, I make my way to the house I unlock the front door and hurry inside, scanning the living roo looks norain, when she ran the first time, she barely took any of her stuff