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I wake up My shirt crumpled on a fuzzy carpet My shorts astray on a dresser And I think ood Somewhere between the folds of the sheets or maybe hidden by the doorway I can’t re Maybe he undressed me

My neck heats as I take a quick peek at the sleeping beauty, so his hipbone He turns a fraction, facing s to his pillow, practically kissing the white fabric As he lets out breathy snores, hisscent of alcohol and pepperoni pizza wafts right towards me

I sure kno to choose ‘em

I masterfully slip fro on one to a naray tee, tattered and practically in shreds, the foggy ih the threshold of his roo Hulk Was that even sexy? I cringe Must have been sexy enough to sleep with me

Desperate, I find a discoloredit over led and greasy That’s when I find htail it out of his bedroom

Empty beer cans scatter the narrow hallway, and I stumble over a bottle of Jack Daniels, filled with black spittle and what looks like a Jolly Rancher A photo collage of inebriated college girls decorates the door to my left—thankfully not the rooe that Kappa Phi Delta horn dog and find a guy that doesn’t advertise his conquests

I should know better I swore off frat houses after ht I arrived at fraternity row, AOZ was hosting a the’s archway to befor one awry Not that I have much in the upstairs department to show off Before I convulsed in eed between torsos and found pleasure at other places and with other people

Ones that didn’tappraised

Last night I broke a rule Why? I have a proble no happens to be one of them When Kappa Phi Delta announced that Skrillex would be playing in their baseirls and regular college folk Maybe I’d be able to land a norraphic centered on frat guys Lots of thea

And Skrillex never showed It was just a laure

Deep, male voices echo off the marble balusters on the balcony and staircase, and my feet cement by the wall People are awake? Downstairs? Oh no

The walk of shaiate society For one, I blush Like intense tomato-red No cute flushed cheeks Just rash-like patches that dot ic to embarrassment

The ht in my mind The one where I stumble down the stairs and all heads whip in my direction The look of surprise coats their faces, wondering what “brother” of theirs decided to hook up with a flat-chested, gaunt girl Maybe they’ll throw a chicken bone atme to eat

Sadly that happened in fourth grade

Likely, I’ll sputter unintelligible words until one of the red, leopard spots and shuffles e

This was such a ain will I be forced to hoover tequila shots like a vacuu

My options are lirow a pair of wings and fly out of the second-floor , I’m about to face the walk of shame I creep to the balcony and suddenly envy Veil froer can vaporize into nothingness A power I could surely use right now

As soon as I reach the top step, the doorbell rings and I peek over the railing About ten fraternity brothers are gathered on leather sofas, dressed in various versions of khaki shorts and collared shirts The es to stand on two feet, his brown hair swept back and his jaw intily squared As he answers the door, my spirits lift

Yes! This is my one opportunity to dash out unseen

I use the distraction to glide down the steps undetected, channeling my inner-Veil Halfway to the botto the entrance “Party’s over, man” The words sound cottony in hisshut in the person’s face

I hop over two more stairs

The bell rings again For sorier

Squared-jaw groans and yanks the knob hard “What?”

Another frat guy laughs “Just give him a beer and tell him to piss off”

A few more steps Maybe I can really do this I’ve never been a particularly lucky person, but I suppose I’m due for a dose

Squared-jaw keeps his hand planted on the frae “Speak”

“First of all, does it look like I can’t read a clock or furthermore don’t knohat daytime looks like? No shit, there’s no party” Holy…I know that voice

I stay planted three-quarters down Sunshine trickles through a tiny space between the doorfrae Polo He clenches his teeth, about ready to slauy’s face, but the intruder puts his hand on it and says, “I left soht”

“I don’t re here”

“I was” He pauses “Briefly”

“We have a lost and found,” Squared-jaw says curtly “What is it?” He edges away from the doorframe and nods to someone on the couch They watch the scene like a reality rerun on MTV “Jason, go grab the box”

When I glance back, I notice the guy outside Eyes right on me