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Oh, fuck, no “I hate texting wo them more”
“You hate being texted by woain”
StoutI have a four-step routine when it co
One: I fuck a woman
Two: She clings Every Time Because that’s what they do
Three: I call it quits
Four: End of story
I’m not a manwhore Well, maybe I am a little
I was ette for six years We weren’t in love Never were She was my best friend and unfortunate circue neither of us wanted I couldn’t love her the way a husband should, so our an We never had a chance at edy Too much hurt
But I did love her in a different kind of way And I respected the voe made to one another, even if ere only nineteen at the time That means I didn’t fuck around on her Until she asked e
So, yeah I guess I’ve used the time since our divorce to have aswomen No harm in that
Those looking in at le destined to end poorly for ette’s or Warren’s fault they fell in love It just happened I wasn’t a husband to her so I didn’t feel betrayed People couldn’t understand that or how I could be so forgiving Especially after everything that happened
As Bridgette’s husband, I was the partition betweentwo people I loved fro brutal
I didn’t want to be the one standing in the way of their happiness so I did the only thing I could: step aside as Bridgette’s husband and as Warren’s business partner Best decision of my life
Fuck, I don’t knohy I’ buried
“I know I’hts back to the present
Why ask me? “Porter knows your sister Wouldn’t he be the better candidate?” That makes better sense to me
Stout laughs “Porter goes coet he was supposed to be texting as me and hit on her” I’ve never known Porter to be interested in one particular wouess the Lawrence type
“I’ my workload off on Porter It would be pretty shitty to place double duty on hiree with that
I lean back inasked of me There is no way I could come off as Stout We are so different
He’s a dreamer An idealist
I’istical
I know nothing about his relationship with his sister or their history This is nuts
But Lovibond needs this probleram is what it’ll take, then I have to help make that happen
“Why do you feel the need to keep this from your sister? You’re an adult Can’t you tell her what happened the same way you told me?”
“If she knoas charged with DUI, she’ll immediately worry I’m an alcoholic I’m not I swear I can lay it down today, never have another drink, and I’d be fine”
Stout likes to have a good time, but it’s never caused a problem “I know you’re not”
“We have a strong fa addiction so I don’t want to upset her” He’s never mentioned that
“You’re saying it would be likelike that?”
“Probablydeal Shein her life Porter could help you out if you run into a problem”
It’s texting I hate that shit, but how bad can it be? “I’ll do it”
Stout closes his eyes He brings the top of his closed fist to his mouth and clears his throat before he chokes out, “Thank you”
“No problem” At least I hope there?
??s no problein?”
“I’”
“That soon, eh?”
“No reason to wait The sooner this is behindabout that Lovibond is going to suffer while he’s out
“How are we going about doing this?” I need specifics if I’ to pull this off without a hitch
“We usually speak once or twice a week When you don’t take her call, she’ll leave a e She always does You’ll need to be clever when you decide how to explain ahy I’m unable to talk You can’t bullshit Lawrence Her meter is spot on”
“What do youwas that this whole thing was specifically about bullshitting her”
“It is I just ive her any of that usual nonsense you feed woenuine Respond the way you would with your sister”
I don’t have one of those But I have Bridgette She’s very much like a sister and I’d never bullshit her “I’ll do my best”
“And you have to tell her you love her at night That I love her You knohat I mean”
I have all the feels now “Should I text her hearts as well?”
“I send the s kisses Or hearts Either is fine” I Was Fucking Kidding
I’ve never done hearts, flowers, or any of that other shit with a woette It wasn’t hoith one another “All right It’ll be hearts and kissies for sissy”
“I owe you one, Tap”
“Yeah, you do A big one And don’t you forget it” But do you have debts with friends?
“Name what you want I’ll make it happen”
“I hope you know I plan to make this worth my while”
“I’d expect no less out of you, Tap”
Texting the sister Hearts and flowers I’ot this