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Chapter One

Adam

I STEP ONTO THE SMALL stage constructed in the sand and, though I can’t stop grinning, the only thing on my mind is Claire and hoish she were here to see this Hank Langley hands me the third place trophy and pullsHank is the promoter for the co two years ago and he’s the only reason I made it onto the roster for this event

As soon as we arrive at the hotel, the ne is ordered frorab my phone out of my backpack and sneak off to the bathroom to call Claire

I open the bathroo some chick on the bathroom counter The same Paul Leyva as ranked fourth in the world on the ASP world rankings last year The chick makes eye contact with me and I slam the door shut before I make my way into the hotel corridor The scroll pattern on the carpet makes me think of the curtains in my dad’s study He doesn’t knohere I aain he’d tell ain What he doesn’t know is that I’ this as much for Claire as I am for myself

I sink down onto the carpet next to the ice h the first ring

“Hey”

Her voice is soft yet eager and fills me with relief

“Hey, baby What are you doing?”

I hear a rustling on the other end and I i down a book or a pile of notes

“Studying I have a statistics test on Monday Where are you?”

“I’ot back I came in third”

She pauses for a moment “I’m so proud of you I knew you’d do well”

“I’ll be there in six days You can congratulate me then”

There are so ht that her ex would be dropping off so, but I don’t want to pry I don’t want to push her away, but the long pause on the other end concerns me

“I don’t know if I can wait six days,” she finally says “I wish I was there with you to rub your sore muscles and fall asleep in your arms”

“I wish you were here, too Idown?”

She giggles because she thinks I’ to initiate phone sex

“I just want to picture you,” I insist “I’ to jerk off out here”

“Yes, I’ down”

“What are you wearing?”

“I’ht for me”

“Is that it?”

“And my panties”

“Take the quicken “Please” The ets me excited “Claire?”

“Adam?”

“When was the last time I touched you?”

“Six days ago”

“When was the last time you touched yourself?”

She giggles again and I wait for her to get over her e”

I don’t knohy I torture irls down the hall who’d get on their knees for me in a heartbeat Maybe I just need to prove to ed

“I love you, Claire”

“I know”

“You knoould never hurt you”

“I know Are you okay?”

I want to tell her howChris while we’re apart I want to tell her how much it kills me that he can show up at her dorm or outside her classroom anytime he wants But she doesn’t want to hear that shit

“Yeah, I’et your hoht… when you touch yourself”

“I wouldn’t think of anyone else”

“I can’t hide anything from you, can I?”

“Adam, I love you I’ll wait six days or six years Whatever it takes Nothing and no one else matters”

This isn’t true There is one other person who matters as much, or more, to Claire than I do And I can’t even be upset about it because that’s exactly as it should be But that doesn’t change the fact that being her number torries the hell out of me

“Tuck yourself in tight Goodnight, baby”

“Goodnight”

I lean forward to slide the phone into the back pocket of ainst the wall and stare at the framed picture of a floral still life on the wall in front of et so drunk or high I won’t re But I can’t stay out here Maybe I should just take a taxi to the airport and catch the next flight to Raleigh to surprise Claire

Fuck that That’s a desperate move I’m not desperate

I trudge back to the rooned to lay off the booze and keep h the door, I’ood smoke I step inside the hazy hotel room and spot Yuri Takahashi, number twenty-six in the world and one ofit up, s from the small pipe in his hand

A hand clasps the back of rips uys I turn around and the girl I just saw getting boned by Paul is giving me a come-fuck-me look Her dark hair is tousled and her black eye makeup is smeared across her left temple I’ beforeonly a short skirt

“Not gonna happen,” I say as I push her hand off my neck

She curls her lip in disgust “What? Are you gay?”

I shake my head as I turn my back on her and make my way toward Yuri

“Hey, it’s the fucking comeback kid,” Yuri says when he sees me

He grins broadly as he passes hter I think of Claire and I almost hand it back to hi the pipe to hter’s flame to the bowl It’s been more than a week since I’ve toked so the hot ss I hold in the smoke as I pass the pipe back to Yuri

He shakes his head “That’s your bowl, bro Finish it”

I let the ss and finish off the bowl I hand the pipe to Yuri and he taps the ash out into an ashtray before he packs it again The ets inside my head I lean back in my chair and close my eyes as I lose myself in the music

The sounds of giggles and whispers can barely be heard over the song I don’t knohat’s going on until I feel soirl is back and she’s trying to undo the button on my shorts

I push her hands away and she laughs She’s fucked up So am I But I’m not stupid

I stand up and she reaches for ain “Fuck off,” I mutter as I step around her and ain

I stand in the corridor for aI’hts over and over again I think of texting Claire, but she needs to study Then I think of going back inside, but I’et out of this hotel Fuck the backpack I have my wallet and my phone That’s all I need

I make it down to the lobby and jump into the first taxi I find outside the hotel “Orlando Internatio

nal”

The cabbie looks atabout my appearance makes him skeptical and he appears about ready to kick me out of the cab, but he relents and pulls away from the hotel entrance

I don’t knohat the fuck I’ I don’t trust myself

The taxi pulls onto the highway and I realize I left my trophy in the hotel room I can call the front desk and ask them to ship it to me tomorrow, if it’s still there