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It was proving tootheir funeral The process itself was stressful enough and not unlike the wedding planning: find a venue, find a minister, find a caterer, order flowers, but piled on top of everything else and I was about to have a break down

I wish Richard was here He's so good at keeping his calanized But Richard was at the capital again He's so busy with his ca at the next level I barely see him

And Erik

Well Erik hasn't been ho the last phone nu me "dearie" but insisted it had been her number for at least 2 years Of course, I also had to sit politely through her explanation of how her oldest son had bought the cell phone for her and how she wasn't exactly sure hoorked

I sent a few emails to the last address I had listed for him when Mo back I don't know if he still uses that account or if he just doesn't check it oftenor maybe it was just because of me

I looked through the pile of paperwork that had been sitting on Mo to be paid, a letter fro for an old-fashioned reply with pen and paper that will never arrive now, bank staterocery store

I wish Mom was here She'd knohat to do I wish Dad was here, he'd be coive h it I wish anyone was here

I found them in a drawer of the computer desk, a short stack of postcards all from Erik Most of thees about how ood Mexican food in Iowa

I breathed deeply At least he'd been staying in touch with the inside me fell at the realization

I'd been suspicious of it ever since he left but so roo them for the last six years, it really sunk in It was all too real for h my core as the tears broke loose

I hadn't donein the few days since Mom and Dad were declared dead Only 14 hours apart froet used to the idea that Moh tiot the call froet there in tiood bye

Richard had said he'd come home if I needed him to but I knew he needed to stay, so I told him I could handle it myself Noish I had asked him to come home

I started putting the contents of Mo for was the paperwork that she had showed me once that had all the instructions for her funeral on it It was in a green folder somewhere I knew she'd written it all down after Grando through this" phase and ements were taken care of

Fat lot of good it was doing me now I had no idea where she had put her files I also had no idea if she had included Dad's wishes

I s him "dad," it had always made him so proud that I chose to call him that Gerald hadthat had ever happened to her Part of ine either of the without the other They were a true love story

Dark thoughts rolled throughstor that had happened to Mom and he had been the best dad I could hope for-- far outshining the asshole that donated his DNA to me-- if only Gerald hadn't had any children of his own already

I sat there, in Moh the postcards from Erik

Erik

Mo Gerald for several months before I h to get us kids involved, Moht We ordered take out pizza and watched

I liked Gerald immediately I kneas in love with Mom and I'd never seen Mo hands when they thought I wasn't looking