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3 Years

9 Weeks

5 Days

When I was six, Dad toldreally true; everyone has a to-do list

It took me another eleven years to actually make one, but thanks to a certain assle in my life, my list is finished;

1 Don’t talk about love

2 Don’t think about love

3 Thinking and talking about love leads to Love, which is the enemy Do not consort with the enemy Even if those hot-ass actors in the , don’t fall for it It’s the biggest bad in the world, the worst villain ever created by hormone-pumped pubescent uy who’s alwaysIt’s the final boss in the ame you call your life

Everyone at Avery Brighton’s party right now has their own to-do list, and ;

1 Get drunk

2 Get more drunk

3 Try not to vomit on anyone cute

4 Try to score with the cute person you tried your best not to vomit on

It’s a foolproof list that’s easy for even idiots to follow It ensures you’re drunk enough to think everyone is cute, so that you don’t throw up on anyone, and so you try to score with everyone It’s basically a how-to for people atch tooblind drunk andout with someone they don’t remember It makes everyone here intolerable Especially the boys One of thes their arestively about going somewhere quieter I wrinkle my lip and push him off before I hurry into the kitchen People are too busy boozing up here to bother hitting on girls Not that I get hit on a lot Getting hit on is still a new thing, a weird thing, because boys don’t generally hit on fat girls and that’s what I used to be The fat girl

I pull my Florence and the Machine t-shirt lower toyour stretch h probably isn’t the best way to make influential friends Or friends, period I’d settle for either Hell, I’d settle for an eneh school is the shittiest ride in the world

“Isis!” A drunk girl sloshes up to me, black hair plastered to her face with sweat “Hiiiii! How are…what…you’re doing in here?”

“Uh, yes?” I try She giggles

“I’m Kayla We met in history of the…planet”

“World History,” I offer

“Yeah!” She claps and points at me “Wow You are really smart”

“I’ll be really wet if you don’t stop that” I gently position her hand upright, her red cup of beer precariously dripping on the floor and my jeans

“Oh, will you be wet?” She closes both her eyes really hard and sain

“What are you doing?” I ask

“Winking!”

“Where I come from, that’s called drunk”