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CHAPTER 1
"I don't want to die again," Laszlo groaned
Jack knelt beside Laszlo's sprawled body "Can I fetch you anything? A warm cup of Type O?"
Laszlo covered his mouth "Don't talk about food"
"Mi dispiace" Jack patted the Vauy's shirt that wasn't soaked with spewed Blissky Poor Laszlo He'd only drunk one glass of the whiskey-flavored synthetic blood when everyone had toasted the groo Va it He'd promptly thrown up all over himself
There wasn't uy, so the bachelor party had raged on in full force while Laszlo rolled on the floor, his face clammy and pale
"Shall I help you move to the couch?" Jack asked
"I et blood on it," Laszlo mumbled
Jack frowned at the rich upholstery on the Louis XV-style furniture "It's already stained" What a mess Hoould he ever clean this up?
He rose to his feet with a growing sense of dooreat idea when he'd reserved an Edwardian suite at the Plaza on Fifth Avenue to celebrate Ian MacPhie's last night as a bachelor But now he realized the hotel's housekeeping service would wonder how an innocent party could produce so many bloodstains
Things had gotten out of hand after Dougal arrived with his bagpipes Ian had insisted on teaching everyone a Scottish jig A dozen tipsy Valasses full of Blissky had resulted in a few collisions and even more stains on the carpet and furniture
And then the phone call had co a bridal shower, though Jack had heard that Vanda was bringing a htclub The ladies' party had coone into labor
Before teleporting to Roanesti had lamented that he was too inebriated to help his wife in her tiuys to rally around, declaring their undying support with a rowdy fight song Then a dozen drunken male Vamps had teleported to Shanna's side to cheer her on to victory
Jack grinned as he iined Shanna's reaction, but the moet this hotel suite back to normal
A noise frouys stayed behind? Good, he could use the help He strode into the luxurious bedroo Bleer on the satin comforter
That had been Gregori's bright idea He'd arrived at the party toting two Vampire Artificial Nutritional Needs Appliances, otherwise known as VANNAs The lifelike rubber females were sex toys in the mortal world, but for Vamps, they'd been ori had filled the two sexy dolls with beer-flavored synthetic blood, and then he'd invited the guys to have a bite Frouys had hadon her
A man's voice drifted from the bathroom "Oh, yeah, baby Take it off!"
Jack knocked on the bathroom door "The party's over"
"The party's never over for Dr Phang" The door opened, revealing Phineas McKinney "What's up, bro?"
The young black Va jacket and white silk cravat, although the cavalier effect was eBob boxer shorts Like any vaold-framed mirror, but the second VANNA did The dark-tinted doll was sitting on the whitebut red silk panties and a silly grin on her face
Jack was distracted for a mo the Sponge "Ah, sorry to interrupt"
Phineas's face turned a bit red "I was just practicing, you know When you're the Love Doctor, you gotta keep your mojo in top condition"
"I understand"
"I bet you do" Phineas grabbed the black VANNA off the vanity Her legs jutted stiffly forward like a Barbie doll, and he pushed them down "I heard you're a real Casanova"
"So they say," Jack muttered He could never escape his famous father's reputation "I suppose you were too busy to hear, but Shanna went into labor All the guys left with Roman Except Laszlo He's still sick"
"No shit?" Phineas strode into the bedroom with the black VANNA clasped under his arm
"The sun will rise soon, so we need to clean up"
Phineas glanced at the white VANNA on the bed in a pool of Bleer "Damn, bro We need professionals for this How about Vampy Maids? They clean Roman's townhouse"