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CHAPTER 1

Lu-Anne

I knoo things about ood

One, he’s ridiculously hot Think of all the usual cheesy rood, carved statue, steel rear end, chiseled features, eight pack, gorgeous male references Yes They’re seriously all true

Second, he’s into some shady shit How do I know this? Well, for starters, he always dresses in black Black hoodies, black jeans, big black boots, black aviator sunglasses, and a black ball cap That’s weird, right? No one goes out in the heat of a Chicago summer day dressed like that unless they want to oo within a few o Hello… setting for like every Mafia, bootlegging, adventure true crime story and movie there ever was I’ like that and only leaving the house at odd hours of the night isn’t normal

And yes I have seen him without his hat and hoodie, at approxi bin sans shirt, in his black jeans, so I know the first point is applicable I guess I could add a third I also know he’s environmentally conscious

You ht think I’ on hbor I work froe hours because I’ve always had trouble sleeping, so I’ht Some of my best ideas come to me then

Also, the guy justnehen souys who aren’t married and don’t have kids This place is not exactly atypes Or rather, our neighborhood isn’t

The sound ofaway fro, staring guiltily through the blinds at the house next door

“What the heck are you doing?”

My best friend, Leanne, sees right through h, and uilty as hell

“Nothing” I give herit

We becahborhood We were both in third grade I thought it was neat that her name was kind of the same as mine Lu-Anne and Leanne are pretty siirl, I didn’t think it was so neat that she was prettier than me I still talked to her anyway because I wanted to be nice My brother always said the only thing worse than having me as a little sister would be if I turned out a catty brat He was four years older I didn’t understand what catty meant back then, but I did knohat a brat was, and I felt that not liking a girl because she had blonde hair, expensive clothes, the sweetest cat shoes complete with little ears, eyes, and whiskers, and a cute as hell button face, could be filed under that category

I’, because, as it turned out, Leanne esome She esoreat Maybe evenweird and needing to get out hroom into the kitchen

She stops at the fridge, pulls it open, and produces a chilled bottle of white wine

“That’s the stuff,” she says with a dramatic flair She rushes off to the cupboards and pulls doine glasses

It’s just after seven, and we’re set to have our scheduled Friday girl’s night It doesn’t matter how many other friends we’ve had, what jobs we’ve worked, or what guys we’ve dated We always hts I think the world could literally be ending, and Leanne would still give thattowards earth, a crazedraging zo to coossip time

Speaking of gossip, Leanne is definitely not going to let o

“Spying on your hot neighbor again, are you?” She uncorks the wine neatly—solass She swirls hers like a real connoisseur before inhaling and closing her eyes like the wine is died and gone to heaven good “Okay, I know you were spying I saw you I know you You’re acting all crazy because sole dude ht beside yours, but why don’t you just bake a freaking casserole and go over there and welcohborhood like a normal person?”