Page 5 (1/2)
CHAPTER ONE
“I was head over heels in love with her No, that didn’t describe it I was tearher to take it into hers I was falling fro everything ofup every inch ofonfor a chance I was powerless, helpless, and at her mercy”
There’s nothing ht When you wait for hours for that first gliht, the constant reo on, and you get only darkness instead Maybe the sun is out there, so on, but fuck if I knew it All I could see was this darkness, this black oblivion that suckedbut a husk of ht in all this madness My tattoo was a lie
Theafter Perry left me—after I created this hole—the sun never ca on the bed in the den until I couldn’t stand the smell of her hair on the sheets Somehow I made it to the couch, and somehohen I eventually awoke, I wasn’t alone
I wished I was
“Dex” Jenn’s voice broke into the abyss
I didn’t want to face her Last night, she foundon the floor She helped me up, and for the first tiuilt she was carrying matched my own Maybe because that was the last ti the best for last
I opened rey,in the armchair she had pulled up in front of ht it at IKEA She looked just as awful as I did, which uez rese terrible has gone down
“Dex, we need to talk,” she said, her voice hoarse She looked down at her knees, clad in silky paja her eyes
Usually those words make any man sit up Perhaps even jump out the as too hollow, too weak, too blank to do anything except lie there and watch her She looked different, the rooh I could have found so Perry as well And therefore, it
“So talk,” I told her, because I didn’t have the strength to do it myself Besides, I wanted to hear it from her own mouth I wanted to hear her finally ad—the chance to admit mine
She began running her lacquered nails up and down her legs, creating lines on her pants that slowly faded in the silk This was hard for her I took some comfort in that
“I…,” she said and looked up, away frolistened with tears If I could have cared, I would have No one wants to see a wo she-devil “I think we need to break up”
I kept aze steady on her “You don’t say”
She sniffed and gently wiped under her eyes, as if she’d“I haven’t been fair to you And I know you haven’t been fair to me”
My eyes narrowed “How haven’t I been fair?”
She looked at me sharply “You’re in love with another woman”
“And you’re in love with another oing on for?”
She slid over the insult with ease “How long have you and Perry been going on for?”
I jerked a little “It’s not like that”
“Yeah, well, I guess you win then,” she said, pulling her hair off her face She really was such a beautiful girl No wonder I had been blind for so long She had ways ofyou feel like the luckiest ether She made you wonder, why me? But I knehy Because I was safe too We both used each other as a safety net until the holes got too big
And I definitely wasn’t the winner here Not by a longshot
“So, if we’re both being honest for once, tell ?” I repeated
She let out a pained sigh “Since…since you left Wine Babes Since you left me”
I really didn’t want to get pulled into another argument over my departure; all of that shit was aas uess ht
“Why didn’t you just end it?” I asked
She shrugged “Why didn’t you?”
“Because…” I began Then I couldn’t find the words I was afraid I was afraid to take a chance with Perry for a et hurt I was afraid to lose ht not have wanted
“I didn’t kno she felt,” I said quietly, staring at the carpet
She snorted “Right Dex, that girl was head over heels in love with you And you were in love with her I knew it from the moment she walked into this apartment You looked at her in a way that you’ve never looked at me And she looked at you in the way I never did You could have done this properly, you know”
“I’m sorry we can’t all fuck other people behind each other’s back,” I snarled