Page 42 (1/2)

CHAPTER ONE

“Tell me about the accident, Perry”

I barely heard what the doctor said I was busy staring out theof his office, watching the leaves of the oak tree outside waver in the spring breeze It wasn’t quite five o’ clock but the sun was already setting, creating a harsh orange glow behind the buildings of don Portland It caught the edges of the tiny syed with flames, that slow burn towards the middle

But they weren’t on fire, were they? No, they only looked like it

“Perry, where are you?”

I tore ave Dr Freedman the nastiest look I could ht, but like usual, I couldn’t tell what he was thinking He had that stupid nonco stare that never gave anything away All of that was scribbled away on his notepad

“Where the fuck do you think I am?” I sneered at him

He merely nodded and looked down at his precious notepad “Just checking, Perry”

“You’re always saying my name,” I said, and looked back at theThe sunset’s flareen leaf into a burst of criuess shrinks thought they had to constantly remind their patients who they were Well, I kneho I was What I didn’t understand hy I was there Why I was really there No pretenses

“So, tell me about the accident,” he said, careful to leave out my name this time

The accident The accident Always this Goddamn “accident”

A strand of my neon blue hair fell down in front of my face and I examined it carefully It looked dry and brittle; the bleach job I did a few e the core That was the first thing my mom had said, “Not only do you look like a punk, but you’ve ruined your gorgeous hair forever” I was glad it hurt her more than it hurt me It was her fault that I was here Not some accident

I looked through auzy blue curtain and I liked the fact that I couldn’t see Dr Freedh it It made it easier to deal with him

“You tell me about the accident, doctor”

He nodded again to himself I wished he was the one on fire, not the leaves outside

“Who is Jacob?” he asked

I flinched I didn’t knohy

“Jacob is a friend of mine Well, he was a friend of mine”

“Why is he no longer your friend?”

“You knohy He turned creepy After the party…”

“After the party? Last tiot ‘creepy’ before the party”

“Did I?” I asked absently

“How did you first meet?” he continued

The last time I was here, he asked me the same question I don’t knohy I always had to repeat myself and I didn’t understand his fascination with Jacob It really wasn’t that interesting

I took in a deep breath, letting him kno annoyed I ith ain

“Jacob was…”

Jacob was a skid Jacob was 18-years old Jacob failed the 12thgrade probably a million tiether by nues of Knox Gelatine Jacob alore a studded denim vest with a black DOA patch on the back Jacob was kind of always DOA himself He was always in trouble with the police, with his parents, with his schoolmates or with his friends And he thrived on this trouble He’d wear black lipstick to school and try to kiss the jocks Jacob was always asking to get beat up He was a ht he was a h there were parts of me that admired him, that respected his nature to piss off authority, to be true to himself, and be fearless (there were even parts that found the black lipstick to be sexy), Jacob was just kind of an idiot

“Were you in love with him?” Dr Freedman asked, so casually, as if the topic of love was as important as whether I preferred chocolate ice cream or vanilla

“No,” I said adamantly That was the truth I barely knew Jacob Like I said, I admired hiet giddy about it But I got giddy when any guy looked irl

“But you liked hih”

“I guess,” I shrugged I liked hih the first time he really talked to me, away from his friends and the rest of the skids

I alking home from the bus stop one day Normally I would have taken my car to school butto do with drugs, I don’t know

Anyway, I alking ho to my MP3 player, when a tall, spiky shadow appeared beside er then and it was just getting dark enough to put uard

I could tell the person was speaking to me but I couldn’t hear them above the music I don’t knohy people have to talk to you when you’ve got headphones on; I mean, come on