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My neon-green flip-flops smacked off the tile floors but the nurse's sneakers made no noiseWe passed the hall I knew led to the co out in there, which was so strange, because beforebefore he'd been hurt, he'd been such a social butterfly

He'd been a lot of things

Charlie's rooned to have views of the sprawling green landscape and the therapeutic pool that Charlie had never enjoyed He hadn't been much of a swimmer before, but every ti I don't knohat it was about it, ranted-the ability to swim on our own-or maybe it was the fact that water always seemed so limitless to me, but Charlie's future was severely limited

The nurse stopped outside of his closed door "When you're ready to leave, you know the drill"

I did When I left, I had to stop by the nurses' station and check out I guessed they wanted toWith a happy little nod in my direction, the nurse spun in her sneakers and poalked back down the hall

Staring at the door for a moment, I drew in a deep breath and let it out slowly I had to every tiet the er, and sadness-out of me before I walked into the room I never wanted Charlie to see that Sometimes I failed, but I always tried

Only when I thought I could shtly crazed, I opened the door, and like every Friday for the last six years, seeing Charlie was like taking a throat punch

He was sitting in a chair in front of the large floor-to-ceiling -in his chair It was one of those papasan chairs with a vibrant blue cushion He'd had it since he was sixteen, got it for his birthday just a few ed for him

Charlie didn't look up when I stepped into the room and closed the door behind me He never did

The room wasn't bad at all, rather spacious with a full-sized bed neatly made by one of the nurses, a desk I knew he never used, and a TV that I'd never, in the six years, seen turned on

Sitting in that chair, looking out the , he was so thin, beyond y Nurse Venter toldhim to eat three square e it to five sotten so bad they had to do a feeding tube, and I could still taste that fear, because I thought I'd lose him then

His blond hair had been washed this , but it wasn't styled and was much shorter than how he used to wear it Charlie had favored that artfullya white shirt and gray sweat pants, not even the cool kind No, these had those elastic bands at the ankle, and God, he would've thrown a fit if he knew he'd be wearing thehtfully so, because Charliewell, he had style and taste and so much

Walking toward the second papasan chair with a o, I cleared my throat "Hey, Charlie"

He didn't look