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Chapter 1

The Awakening

I stand by the doorway and wait patiently while she looks at what used to be her body

Turning slowly, she brings her vivid blue eyes to look up at el?” she asks in a timid voice

If I had a penny for every time I’ve been asked that - well not that pennies are of any use to me, but still

I gently shake el But I aels” I add a friendly smile to make her feel more at ease

She considers this for aparents who sit agonised by her bedside

“Will I ever see theain?” I can hear the tremor in her tiny voice, sadness I know it to be

“Yes I don’t knohen, but one day you will see theain”

This I’ed to have seen with my own eyes, but it is what the Elders tell us to be true

I deliver humans to the door of Heaven To their door into Heaven, but don’t truly knohat occurs when they pass through But I do know it to be soo there

I’er

It’s what I do, and have done since I’ve existed I’uide, to h their,

Hule to leave behind the ones they love And for their sake, I have to ensure they don’t try to stay here on earth, trapping themselves for all eternity Because once they walk away froo there Once their door closes, it never again opens

I glance over at her parents The hter’s lifeless hand The father has silent tears trickling down his cheeks as he desperately tries to comfort the mother They both appear broken, beyond repair

Humans always take the death of a child the worst I think I understand why this is

I have seen what these two people are feeling hundreds, of thousands, of times before Have been told in vivid description by many humans who I’ve taken to Heaven how it feels, but have never felt it myself

I don’t feel

Not in the physical or es - sorrow, happiness, love, pain, compassion I also note the sensation of touch But I don’t actually feel it

I do co in the bright blue sky, or the sound of a songbird singing gaily in theJust not in the same way as a human does

I know of all the feelings that surround me every day, but they just don’t attach themselves to me

That’s just how it is – Bringers don’t feel

I believe ere conceived like this, so we don’t attach ourselves to humans in any way

Often, though, I do wonder hoould be to feel

With what I see in every single moment of my existence it obviously presses onising pain of loss, or to have never felt it at all?

I have no concept of what it is like to love someone with such ferocity that it rips you to your very core to lose the

I just sometimes wonder, what if

The child I’m here to take to Heaven – Amy Jones, as I know her to be called - takes one last look at her parents, at her body, then turns and tentatively walks toward me Her movement slow, reluctant

It’s strange that humans have two names Sometimes they have three, four, sometimes more I have only one

When Amy Jones reaches me, she slips her tiny hand into mine and looks up at me

“You look likeher head toward her mother

I ponder that for a moment

Interesting

It intrigues me how I look to each human They see me as whichever female human form makes them feel most comfortable Like noith Amy Jones, she chooses to seeher feel safer They do this unknowingly

I have never seen myself I have no reflection upon which to do so When I look down all I see is a solid listens and sparkles, just as the snow does when the sun is gently dancing off it

Often I have wondered what my true appearance is, or if I at all have one

I look at theHair the colour of ripe cherries, skin the colour of the pale moon, eyes the colour of emeralds

Is this exactly as I look now?

I glance down at Amy Jones about to ask this very question, when I see a faraway look in her eyes, sadness covering her face And very quickly, my question becomes incredibly futile

“Are you ready to go?” I ask instead

Her eyes glitter up at el?”

I sel I think it somehow comforts them to think I am

“Lucyna”

“Lucyna,” she huoing to Heaven, Lucyna?”

“Yes, Amy Jones you are”

“Will you be staying with me in Heaven?”

“No I can only remain with you until we reach Heaven’s door”